the night is falling

Yes, it's getting dark and the day is going,
the night is falling,
tonight I feel you deep inside my heart with longing.

That's as far as I'll take my poetry tonight because I know that when it's nighttime it's time for me to get ready to talk to you; to hear your voice, see how your day went, and I long for that moment that wont come tonight. The moment I long for so much is coming soon, but not tonight-still, it's getting closer. Your voice will only be the one I have in my heart,the sweet words and laughs, those I will only remember tonight. Those great moments in which your voice bared love and care because it's that voice that is worth remembering, that is the voice that I choose to hear and the voice that I choose to sketch my smile. I wish I could be a part of you tonight and hear all about your night and your crazy great adventures in the day. I long for you every minute that I let you linger into my mind and mostly into my heart-this happens every minute that it's darker, and later outside. When darkness covers all, my heart's sunshine brightly shines upon yours to let my eyes, my soul, see within it. Your heart is beautiful, your intentions too I know this because I've been in love with you-I still am. It's getting closer and closer to that time for me to hear your voice say 'I love you & good night' and though it may not come tonight, inside I feel peace and joy from knowing that you'll also be missing me and longing for me.
For now I'll be more than happy writing these memoirs to you. These memoirs of love and feelings of longing for you. So that you know just how much I've really thought about you. So that you know just how much my heart loves you and how good it is, how good and wholesome my love is for you.

I am willing to take this time to take off on a little vacation into my heart and my mind. It's truly amazing how much I've discovered about us within myself, and most importantly how good it feels to find that it is all good and that I love you. Though you are imperfect, you are also beautiful in many ways that I know how to appreciate. Now it's time to learn even more ways for me to see how amazing you are in places I never dared discover.

Just know that "your name is on my heart" as you said to me recently.

Leo, your name is on my heart.

everything happens for a reason

right now im thinking a lot
i feel good because my homework is to let a lot of emotions pass me by. a lot of emotions settle and marinate and flush them out.
and i feel sad at times too, because i miss you.
it is without a doubt that i have to say that i love you.
i wish i had a little camera by you so i could spy on you and just so that i could see you smiling and enjoying yourself.

i know you're having a great time. i know your day is going well and mine is too.
i'm a little worried about us, but i am SO OVER THE TOP willing to improve in any way to be happier and make you happier.

you are really amazing to me, you are really sweet to me, you are really great in every way. i just want to enjoy your company; have a few laughs with you and smile because you're next to me, holding my hand. i want to show you so much love, show you how much i care about you, i want to show you so much respect and show you by allowing you to be free in anything you like to do, i want to show you respect by acknowledging what you say, and caring about it. i want to be a best friend, and i want to be your sweetheart.

i hope you feel the way i do, that your thoughts and your memory have focus for only one person. that your heart only answers to another heart's beat. i hope that it is me who inspires you or motivates you.
my thoughts and my memory show me only your eyes, your smile, your beautiful self. smiling at me, or making a silly face,or showing me a big smile when you see me. i only know the beautiful you. my memory too only remembers that side of you. my heart only answers to the song of yours, to your own heartbeat.

at this point i feel like i've departed, like i'm far from you, but i am still with you. like a long trip away from home, and yet i'm at home, and i'm glad that i know you are in my life. i am gone away for a bit because i need this time to heal all these wounds i never took care of. this love we have is not a contest. not for me, i just want to enjoy one day at a time by your side. this is not a strive for perfection either, i am happy with imperfection, i just want to learn to enjoy it. you've taught me many things, but i've yet to accept them and learn them and apply them. however, i am trying my best. i love you with my big red fast thumping heart.

i miss you lovie